Selection from 7/28/2017 10:07 AM
Wow I am finally on my on. My cousin will be back in town in 3 weeks. For now I am only relying on myself and Jesus. Being in a “new world” takes a lot of strength. I have to commend my Grandmother. How can she do this for so long and still want to walk in high heels at 91?!
It is almost November which will be 4 months on my own. Although I have my amazing church family and cousin: I am still depending on just myself and Jesus.
When you work from home & make dinner for just yourself with the silence echoing, you find out who you really are. It’s sort of weird but I developed a value for myself, an identity outside of my parents, and a keep it real attitude only my puppy and TV knows. [Guilty pleasure: talking junk to the television.]
It hits me a lot: no one is forcing me to go to church. No one is making me watch Christian TV as my morning routine. No one is making me write this to you. And honestly, I don’t think anyone would throw stones at me if I didn’t do these things.
I do these things because my heart and spirit finally understand God is the only one I can fully trust. My faith sustains my sanity and fulfillment.
Eventually, I’ll be a stay at home wife with the house fully clean and dinner ready. But even when that day comes — God still has to be #1. Without him, nothing will work.